Joe

A Note That Shook Things Up

When we feel safe our stories unfold more and more for us. That is what I have experienced.

This only makes sense to you if you have experienced significant trauma that has taken your whole life to process.

I wish no one knew what I meant.

This story about Joe has been with me today. I am going with it.

May 2009, Oakland, California

One sunny day, I was unloading groceries from my car and my son, who was four years old at the time, stumbled as he was walking in. He and his brother were not far behind me. When I got to my front door and unlocked it I turned around to see a man approaching me with my son in his arms. I froze in place. I had groceries in my arms. I put them down and took my sun.

“He fell, ” the man said softly. He had a scruffy face with old man blonde hues and grays. He was skinny and tall.

My son looked fine. I carried him inside, with a shiver that this didn’t feel right.

Weird! That’s all I could do-scream in my head. During this period I was in my head, believe it or not. Not in my body.

Not long after that I came home from work to find a three days notice to pay rent or quit sign on my apartment door. I was a little late but knew I’d be able to pay in time, so I wasn’t worried about being evicted. But I felt humiliated everyone on my floor saw it. What the hell?

Louder alarm bells went off

Went through my body when I saw there was a note,

handwritten.

On my three days notice sign.

On my front door.

Hi, I’m Joe, I live down the hall. Seems like things are stressful for you right now. I was wondering if you and your kids would want to go to a movie sometime.

That night after the kids were asleep I went online to check Megan’s list. Its officially called Megans Law but I know it as Megan’s List so that is what I am calling it. If you are not familiar Megan’s list is a public data base where registered sex offenders have to be listed. Visit: Meganslaw.com.

I entered my address and sure enough Joe’s name and photo came right up. I clicked on the information and saw two counts of sexual assault involving children under the age of fourteen on his record.

My numb body, felt something. I felt like I was going to faint!

My numb body, felt something.

My numb body, felt something.

I felt like I was going to faint!

How did I know to look there right away, Megans list? Because I studied laws in college that were in place to protect women and children from predators. It was an area that interested me. I wanted to help women and children by studying public policy. So I got a bachelors and masters in it, from Mills College here in Oakland.

I complained to my landlord immediately. Could I sue him? I called the police. Of course, nothing happened. There are laws barring sex offenders from living within a certain distance of schools. An elementary school was down the street.

My landlord didn’t do anything other than offer to show me another apartment in a different building. It happened to cost more.

I’m now starting to wonder if it wasn’t a f**ing operation—if Dan, the landlord, intentionally housed single moms with young kids in proximity to known child molesters. To surveil. To exploit. To profit.

This only occurs to me now, in this Epstein awareness era. It’s really hard not to wonder!!

In this case, the burden was on me to adjust. I thought Joe should have been kicked out, arrested or something. I thought something was going to go down. It didn’t.

As a single mom I couldn’t afford to hire movers or do it myself. I didn’t have a lot of friends available to help. Through my mom I got some Mormon missionaries to help me move.

I remember a big Tongan guy sitting at the piano in the back of someone’s pickup truck another missionary was driving and pretend he was playing it. He rode to my new place like that, sitting at a tall upright piano. I will never forget it. He had a big smile on his face and made the whole moment fun and cute. I had felt uncomfortable having the missionaries helping, but he softened me with his large playfulness. I wish I had the photo to share. It is here in my heart.

I will have to write you some more soon. Time to rest.

Kadie

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Sending you lots of love.